Well Maybe, I Guess

Say just a simple ‘Yes, I will’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Your word is enough. To strengthen your promise with a vow shows that something is wrong. Matthew 5:37

Sandy, mom Sharon and I (Sheryl is MIA- must be the photographer, or in the kitchen with granny!).

When I was a teenager, one of my mom’s best go-to answers for many of my adolescent requests was “well maybe, I guess.” It was standard issue, when I asked her permission to do something or go somewhere that she was skeptical about. It drove me crazy because I didn’t consider it a “real” answer. Actually, it was the perfect non-answer. It gave me hope while giving her an out at the same time. It was a way to deflect, to not commit, because it wasn’t exactly yes or noOver time, I came to realize that what she really meant was “no” and for whatever reason, she just didn’t want to say it outright.

Sometimes, as believers, I think we’re a lot like my mom was with me back then.  We can be dubious about what we think the outcome should or could be, so we say “well maybe, I guess,” too. It’s a way to keep our options open, a way to have things on our terms, especially when we don’t agree with what God has in mind, with His timing, with the people He brings into our lives and the things He uses to to accomplish His purposes. We get too caught up in trivial things, or better, yet, we get too full of ourselves to remember who is He is and what He can do…”He leads forth the starry host by number; He calls each one by name. Because of His great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing” (Isaiah 40:26). We doubt His intentions. We doubt His faithfulness. 

One thing I’ve come to have no doubt about is this: God is true and faithful to His word. He says what He means, and He does what He says. He tells us exactly how it is – do this and that happens, do that and this happens – straight up, no sugar coating. We are the ones who play games with words, who “tweak” their meanings to fit our idea of what is good and true. We even try to use His words against Him, twisting them to suit what we want, saying things like, “you say ‘ask and it will be given to you,’ but you still haven’t given me what I’ve asked for,” never realizing that what we’re really asking is for Him to bow down before us, to acquiesce to our will. 

Now that mom is in full-blown dementia, she uses her old stand-by a lot. She says “I guess” because she can’t remember, and is therefore unsure, and sometimes that doubt is expressed in emotional outbursts. As I watch her slip further and further into the abyss, I have a new appreciation for the breadth of God’s love for us. It brings to mind 2 Peter 3:9 which says, “The Lord does not delay his promise, as some understand delay, but is patient with you, not wanting any to perish but all to come to repentance.”  We can be so defiant and “stiff-necked,” and no matter how many times we deny we know him, He’s still there, standing beside us, patiently forgiving our doubts, helping us when we cry out to Him. He’s willing to wait, to take the insults, the accusations, the disbelief. He’s willing to die for us –  that’s how much He loves us – even when we tell Him, “well maybe, I guess! “

~SLM

Proverbs the Handbook of Life Part V: Words Count

When I was a kid, whenever someone was mean we’d say “sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me.”  It’s a glib little saying, meant to help us through a difficult situation by reminding us that what others say of us can only define us when we allow it to, a way to remind ourselves that it is how we are judged by God that counts. But words do have power, they may not break our bones, but they can break our will, our heart, and our spirit. Proverbs 18:21 tells us that every word we speak promotes either life or death, that our words can either encourage or devastate, build up or tear down.

In fact, the Proverbs are filled with warnings about the cavalier use of language. It behooves us, then, to not only watch what we say to others, but also how we say it. There are so many times in life when we just ramble on incessantly, carelessly repeating the latest gossip without ever stopping to think of how our words are impacting those around us. We prattle on, so wrapped up in our own little universe, so convinced that we have the “right” to say anything we want to say, never understanding that while we can say whatever we choose, wisdom dictates that we choose our words carefully, thoughtfully, lovingly.

In Matthew 12:33-37, Christ says this:

33 “Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. 34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. 35 A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36 But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the Day of Judgment for every empty word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”

Words count. They can be the most beautiful sound in the world, or tear our world completely apart, and we can choose every day to speak life.

Heavenly Father,

Fill my life with peace and love. Fill each breath I take with the wonder of your creation. Show me the meaning of faith; let me know it with every fiber of my being. Teach me to trust that no matter how it appears, I am fully taken care of, and that all of my needs are met at every moment. Help me to shine Your light brightly, so others may be witness to Your majesty. Speak to my heart; let Your Word be my guide, so I may speak life in all I do.  Amen.

~SLM